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The Ventura Gem & Mineral Society, Inc. (VGMS)
Rockhound Rambling
March 2007.

Rockhound Rambling Photo of the Month.

This month's photo is by Mary Polacek. Description: Grandpas Frame. Subject is a portion of a picture frame created by Mary's grandfather, JosephZander, of unidentified fluorescent rock. Watch for the story in a future issue!

Rambling Picture of the Month is a VGMS Member Photograph. Subject may be a specimen in their own collection or a rock, mineral, gem or lapidary creation of others, accompanied with documentation of subject origin. Selection is at the discretion of the editor. Submit candidate photos to vgms_editor@adelphia.net.

Table of Contents.

• PRESIDENT'S MESSAGE;
• WORDS TO LIVE BY;
• BIRTHDAYS;
• UPCOMING VGMS EVENTS;
• HOSPITALITY;
• PROGRAM REVIEW;
• PROGRAM SCHEDULE;
• MEMBERSHIP;
• MEETING MINUTES;
• VGMS 2007 SHOW UPDATE.;
• CHIPS AND BOULDERS;
• FIELD TRIPS ARE FUN;
• HINTS AND TIPS FOR ROCKHOUNDS - See NOTE at end;
• FEDERATION NEWS;
• DETERMINING THE TOWNSHIP;
• FOSSIL COLLECTING BILL;
• LET'S BE SAFE OUT THERE;
• EDUCATIONAL CORNER;
• 2007 CFMS SHOWS;
• CALIFORNIA'S DESERTS;
• THINK YOU ARE SMART;
• SOUND BARRIER: DID YOU KNOW IT IS A VISUAL THING;
• MUD GEYSER DISASTER;
• ANCIENT IMPACT TURNED PART OF EARTH INSIDE-OUT;
• NEULOGISM CONTEST 2006;
• STORY OF THE THUNDEREGGS.

PRESIDENT'S MESSAGE.

I want to thank everyone who was involved with the 2007 VGMS show for their outstanding support. Without a doubt it was the finest event since I've been involved with the club. More than one dealer told me that they made more on Saturday than they did the entire weekend last year. We'll have to wait for the final figures, but I understand that the Silent Auction set a new record. I've never seen so many plants, the crowds were huge, and even my autograph was in great demand. Again, a big thanks to everyone.

Now, give Abe your support for next year's show.

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WORDS TO LIVE BY.

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

Thou shalt not weigh more than your refrigerator.

Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.

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BIRTHDAYS.

We wish all of you good health and hope you have (had) a very, very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

     Cyndie Day - March 02,
     Miriam Tetreault - March 06,
     Howard Balentine - March 16,
     Greg Davis - March 18,
     Callie Stephens - March 19,
     Rebecca Foster - March 20,
     Heidi Mauer - March 25,
     Cyndy Treutelaar - March 27.


     Sharon Hixson - April 02,
     Richard Bromser - April 10,
     Matthew Sanford - April 19,
     Roy Boulch - April 22.

Is your birthday missing? Call Mary Polacek at (805) 644-5090 and leave a message, or email me at vgms_editor@adelphia.net. Thanks!

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UPCOMING VGMS EVENTS.

If omitted, time, location or address can be found on the VGMS Info Page. (Close the new window to return here.)

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HOSPITALITY.

Thirty-three members attended the February meeting. We had four guests: Jim Sumstine, Elsa Gourson, Evelyn Hensley and Cyndie Day.

Thank you Esther and Abe Barshai for the February refreshments.

Following is the Hosts and Hostesses schedule for the remainder of 2007. There are a few open months. If you would like to volunteer for one of these, please contact Sharon Cunningham.

     March: Stephens Family,
     April: Greg and Valli Davis,
     May: Open,
     June: Open,
     July: Mel and Sharon Hixson,
     August: Open,
     September: Open,
     October: Stephens Family,
     November: Pie Potluck,
     December: Holiday Potluck.

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PROGRAM REVIEW.

February's program was a Quartzsite Show-and-Tell and run up to our March 3-4 Annual Show.

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PROGRAM SCHEDULE.

March: Mineral Identification - Ed Clark. If you have a mystery rock, bring it to March's meeting. Ed will help you to identify your treasure.
April: Not-So-Silent Auction,
May: Movie (Selection Pending).

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MEMBERSHIP.

We have 56 members and three pebble pups as of the date of this publication. Membership directories will be mailed the week of March 19.

The VGMS welcomes the following new members:
     Howard and Lara Balentine (Lara is a new pebble pup);
     Cynthia Day;
     Ronald and Janet Ostlund;
     Larry, Terri, Erik and Zachary Bryant;
     Hermelinda Areno;
     Jerry Revard;
     Roy Boulch;
     Elizabeth Nightlinger.

VGMS Club Vests and Badges: The Club vest colors are royal blue with gold lining. You can also buy or make a blue denim vest. A club patch is available to sew on the back of your vest for a cost of $5.00. You may purchase the patch from the Membership Secretary (Nancy Brace-Thompson).

(Webmaster's Note: If you want a printed copy of the following so you can place an order move the mouse cursor to the left of the word 'Attention', push and hold down the left mouse button, and sweep down over the ad with the mouse cursor. This will highlight the contents of the ad. Release the mouse button and, without clicking anywhere else on the page, select EDIT on the browser menu and select COPY. You may then PASTE into any word processor and print in your normal manner. If you highlight too much you may delete the unneeded part with the word processor before printing. This works with any browser I know.)

Attention New Members (or anyone needing a badge).
Need a Club Badge?
Blue Engravers is giving us a $.50 reduction per badge
for advertising space in the club bulletin!
Ventura County Shape badge $11.28 (includes. tax & ship).
ACCOUNT: Ventura Gem and Mineral Society, Inc.
Name (print clearly. It will be on your name badge):

_____________________________________________

Address:

_____________________________________________

_______________________________Zip: __________

Make check payable to and mail to (takes 5-7 business days):
Blue Engravers,
1375 Caspian Ave.,
Long Beach, CA 90813.
If ordering more than 2 badges call them for exact shipping
costs at (562) 983-5140, FAX (562) 983-5146,
E-mail BLUEGRAVR@aol.com.

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MEETING MINUTES.

Minutes of the VGMS Regular Monthly Meeting;
Wednesday, February 28, 2007:
     The regular monthly meeting of the Ventura Gem & Mineral Society was called to order by Ed Clark at 7:30 pm on Wednesday, February 28, 2007, at the Lexington, Ventura, CA.
     The January membership meeting and the February board meeting minutes were corrected and then m/s/c as shown in the bulletin.
     Ed Clark welcomed everyone and directed members in the pledge to the flag. Next, Ed reiterated the need for help at this year's annual show which is only days away. Sign up sheets are on every table so as to give us an indication of the numbers we'll have to man this show.
     Richard Bromser gave the treasurer's report and it was m/s/c to accept it as stated. Richard also stated that our 2007 show plans were progressing well and hopes are for another very successful year. Richard & Shirley will be relocating to Texas in March and the club desperately needs someone to take over duties of the treasurer. Anyone willing to help out should contact Richard or any board member.
     Mary Polacek - The 10th of the month will again be the deadline for articles for the March bulletin.
     Ron Wise - Upcoming field trips will include Bob Fitzpatrick's venture for thulite on March 30-April 1st. This is no joke!
     Florence Meisenheimer - The CFMS show for this year will be held at the Palmdale fairgrounds right off of Highway 14. Paradise may have to relocate in the future and a possibility would be Hope, California. More information is expected shortly.
     Ray Meisenheimer - Ray will be providing a fossil and mineral demonstration this month somewhere for sure.
     Wayne Ehlers - We'll need everyone's help with security when they're not working booths during the show. Wayne also reported that there's still no word from Help of Ojai as to whether they can help us with a new museum location. We're keeping our fingers crossed.
     Jean Wise - Lots has been done for the kids' booth at this year's show but now we need volunteers to sign up and help man it and hand out all these wonderful prizes.
     Jim Brace-Thompson - The Star's Community Section had a nice write up for our show in Friday's paper.
     Lowell Foster - Upcoming presentations for monthly meetings include Ed's mineral identification for March, a silent auction for April and a film in May. Lowell next presented members with their "finds" from Quartzsite, including Jim Brace-Thompson's opal book, tools, jaspers, agate from Agate Creek, Australia, quartz with phantoms and calcite. Nancy Brace-Thompson displayed petersite, imperial jasper, sun stone and opal from Lightening Ridge, Australia.
     Abe and Esther Barshai provided refreshments.
     The next board meeting will be held at the fairgrounds, on March 1st, at 6:00 pm and the next regular meeting will be held March 28, 2007 at the Lexington in Ventura.
     There being no further business, Ed adjourned the meeting at 8:15 pm.
          Respectfully submitted,
          Greg Davis,
          Recording Secretary.


Minutes of the VGMS Board Meeting;
Thursday, March 1, 2007:
     The regular board meeting of the VGMS was called to order by Ed Clark at 6:00 pm on Thursday, March 1, 2007.
     Present: Ed Clark, Ray & Florence Meisenheimer, Richard and Shirley Bromser, Ron Wise, Shirley Layton, Mary Polacek, Jim & Nancy Brace-Thompson, Dave Mautz, Abe Barshai and Greg Davis.
Old business:
     Ed Clark - No word yet from Help of Ojai as to whether we've been included in their plans. The club show set up went well today and we're hoping for a terrific weekend.
     Richard Bromser - Applications for treasurer are still being accepted. Jim & Nancy Brace-Thompson have agreed to co-chair the membership position for the remainder of the year.
New business:
     Richard Bromser - Printed copies of the monthly financial statement were issued, reviewed and it was m/s/c to accept the financial statement as printed.
     Shirley Bromser - Our club has 46 members as of this date. It was m/s/c to accept membership applications from Cynthia Day, Carl Stephens and Elizabeth Nightlinger.
     Shirley Layton - Country store items will be accepted right up until the last minute for our annual show.
     Florence Meisenheimer - Zzyzx will take place March 18 through the 25th. After this, our 45th annual VGMS show, all eyes will be on Palmdale and the CFMS show in June.
     Mary Polacek - The 10th of the month will still be the deadline for articles and submissions to the bulletin. In the near future it will be changed to the first weekend after the board meeting. The new directories will be printed up in late March.
     Here's to a successful show!
     The next general meeting will be on March 28, 2007 at the Lexington in Ventura.
     There being no further business, the meeting was adjourned at 7:00 pm.
          Respectfully submitted,
          Greg Davis,
          Recording Secretary.

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VGMS 2007 SHOW UPDATE.

Plant Sale:
     We had eight tables (each table was 8') of plants to sell on the Saturday morning of our show. By Sunday at 4:00 pm, all that remained was less than one table of plants. A word of thanks to Marie Ehlers for caring for plants before the show, helping with set-up and being at the plant tables on both days. Thank you to all who donated plants.
          Susan Mulqueen.


Donation Raffle:
     What the heck was I worrying about? Members, vendors, and two local businesses (Gary Lee Hair Design and Carlson's Jewelers) together donated a total of 40 raffle items. The exhibit was chock full with an enticing variety of items. Thank you to all of the generous donators. Thank you, Wayne Ehlers, for your announcements; Valli Davis and Sally Cross for assisting with the disbursement of prizes; Kathryn Davis for rounding up the vendor donations.
     We had winners from the following communities: Bakersfield, Camarillo, Canyon Country, Los Angeles, Oak View, Oxnard, Paso Robles, Port Hueneme, San Fernando, Santa Barbara, Simi Valley, Thousand Oaks, Ventura and Woodland Hills. Frank Sterling of Bakersfield won the grand prize of $100. Frank has the winning touch; he won 10% of the prizes!! The Sterlings and Millards of Bakersfield accounted for 18% of the winnings! Other multiple item winners included our own members Shirley Layton, Valli Davis and Kathryn Davis. Congratulations to the winners.

Here is a list of the donations and donors:

Kids' Booth:
     This was an amazing success this year. It was so popular, I had trouble seeing to the table all weekend!! Thank you to Jean Wise and Lowell Foster for bringing it all together, and their dedicated volunteers Sharon Hixson, Esther Barshai, Heidi Mauer, Miriam Tetreault, and Jim Brace-Thompson. These folks did an outstanding job.

The Kids Only Raffle Winners were:
     Luke Dewitt (Newbury Park), age 9, 4th grade.
     Sergio Valdez (Port Hueneme), age 9, 4th grade.
     Angelina Suarez (Simi Valley), age 4.
     Nandi Isara.

     Lowell reported he was very pleased being spontaneously approached by Marina West students (and not just from his class), saying how much fun they had at our show.

     Great Job Jean and Lowell!!


Special Thanks:
     VGMS would like to extend a special thank you to Donna and Larry Knapton. The Knaptons generously donated their weekend to spotlight the wonderful Rock Box Project. They displayed samples of the Rock Boxes, and accompanying teacher literature, that have been offered to the Ventura County public schools. In addition, they also gave to any teacher who inquired their own rock specimen. This was a very busy display and it kept Donna very, very busy. Thank you both for your dedication to the youth of our community.

     There were a lot of teachers at the show this year!!! Thanks to Nancy Brace-Thompson and Valli Davis for getting the word out to the educational community.

     Jim Brace-Thompson did an incredible and effective job as Publicity Chair.


Country Store:
     Thank you Shirley Layton and volunteers Sharlyne Holloway, Sharon Cunningham, and Shirley and Richard Bromser. The club will sorely miss Shirley Layton's Country Store. She has made it special for many years.


Thank you Dave Mautz, Wayne Ehlers, Stuart Bloom, Abe Barshai for security. Special thanks to Dave and Ed for their "cot" duty.


Thank you Shirley Bromser and Nancy Brace-Thompson for stocking the kitchen, and to all who brought in goodies to share.


Thank you to the volunteers for setup and breakdown: Richard and Shirley Bromser, Greg Davis, Ron and Jean Wise, Dave Mautz, Jim and Nancy Brace-Thompson, Mel and Sharon Hixson, Miriam Tetreault, Heidi Mauer, Mary Polacek, Kathryn Davis, Ed Clark, Shirley Layton, Steve and Sharon Mulqueen, Jenna Mast, Miriam and Craig Andrews. Many hands made the work fun (??!!)!


If I have omitted any of our valued volunteers' names it is only due to memory lapse. We sincerely appreciate EVERYONE'S CONTRIBUTION!

THANKS TO ALL OF THE VOLUNTEERS!!
YOU MADE 2007 A SPECTACULAR SHOW!!

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SUPPORT AND PRACTICE
THE AFMS CODE OF ETHICS.

CHIPS AND BOULDERS.

Lapidary Class:
     Would you like to learn how to cut and polish rocks? Come to our lapidary class for a hands-on experience in cutting and polishing rocks.
     The class will be held on Monday evenings from 6:00 to 8:30 starting March 26, and will last 5 weeks until April 23. Bring your own rock or slab if you like, but there will be plenty of slabs there for your use. We will be using the slab and trim saws and our grinding and polishing machines.
     This is probably our last class at this location. We hope our possible new location, if it becomes available, will have space for even a larger workshop.
     The workshop is located at 5019 Crooked Palm Road just off Highway 33 going towards Ojai. Take the Shell Road exit. Turn left to Ventura Avenue. Turn left on Ventura Avenue. About a half mile down, turn left on Crooked Palm Road. Go under the highway and parallel the highway for about a half mile, and 5019 is a little brown building on the left at the corner of the old Petrochem refinery property.
     If you want more information call me at 482-6830, or Greg Davis at 647-9214, or Ron Wise at 647-4393. We hope to see you there.
          Wayne Ehlers.


Big Backyard Rock Sale:
     When: March 24 and 25.
     Where: Marvin Lindner's place, 11 Connolly Circle, Chula Vista, 619-426-4196. Take I-5 south to Palomar/Orange; go east or take I-805 south to Orange and go west. When you reach Connolley Avenue, go south to the Circle address.
     What: Rough rock at $0.25/pound. Slabs, cabs, specimens and MANY other lapidary related items. Bring your own buckets and bags.
     Source: The San Diego Mineral & Gem Society (SDMGS) Pegmatite March 2007.


Also via the SDMGS:
     The life collection of a long-time SDMGS member, Spencer Barnhart, is being sold by his son, Michael Barnhart. Spencer joined the SDMGS in 1946 and was well-known and respected as a faceter. His collection is available in total or by separate catalog, for the best reasonable offer after June 1, 2007. For more information, email Michael at spencerinerals@yahoo.com.


Are you a Jade Lover?
     Consider attending the Fifth Annual Sinkankas Symposium on JADE, hosted by the SDMGS, on Saturday, April 21. For more information and to check on availability, email or call Anne Schafer, annes@san.rr.com, 858-586-1637.


Meteorite Lover?
     Check this internet site: http://www.metorite.com.


The VGMS Workshop is open the third Saturday of each month from 9:00 am to noon unless otherwise notified. Shop Supervisors are Ron Wise (805) 647-4393 and Greg Davis (805) 647-9214. If you plan to attend, call ahead to make sure the museum will be open. A big thank you to Ron and Greg for the opportunity they give the rest of us. The workshop is there for your use; take advantage of it.


Tumbling Grit is still available. Contact any board member to arrange for pick up or come to a workshop Saturday at the museum.


CFMS & AFMS Newsletters:
     Anyone interested in their own subscriptions to these, please contact Mary Polacek (805 644-5090). The cost for one year is $5.50 for the CFMS and $4.50 for the AFMS. I do share some information from these bulletins with you, but there is much more in each issue that you may be interested in. If you have access to the Internet you can download both from their respective web sites for free!

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FIELD TRIPS ARE FUN.

     As an enticement to this year's trip (as if you needed it!), following is an excerpt from a report of last years Thulite field trip. Source: http://www.cfmsinc.org/ and Click field trips, Click Photos of Ludlow Field Trip 4/8-9, 2006.


Ludlow (South Cadys) OBMS/CFMS Field Trip April 8-9, 2006.
Photos and Report by Randy.

Picture 29 is my very first ever lapidary project. It has been shaped but not polished yet. I adjusted the colors to try to match the actual sample. I think this is a good one for 2 reasons: 1) As a geophysicist I have had geological training and I learned to look for the small indications. 2) As a former hunter I learned to look for the PIECE of the animal, a hoof, or tail, or eyes, not the whole creature (I'm past the killing thing now).

     I looked for the best pink I could find in little pieces of float. It was a virgin part of the hillside, although from the Google earth satellite images, I think I can delineate a zone of overall alteration, and some others within 3/4 mile. I also know that you have to get below the soil to un-weathered rock. At that spot I started to dig. Fortunately, what I thought was another float rock was a bit of native outcrop, about 3 inches under the surface. I dug here and found the piece you see and some others 10-20 pounds that I could get with a rock hammer and no other tools. I guess I have accepted being a pack mule years ago to get samples back to camp.
     I remember the location. We could get some serious samples if we go back with a 5' pry bar, a 12'' gad and a sledge; assuming we can't use a drill and explosives [legally].
     I estimate this sweet spot from the float to be about 6' N/S by 2' E/W, maybe 3 ft deep (an educated guess). I know that metamorphic alteration usually comes from depth, so the depth may be more that I estimate; but who wants to get into hard rock mining?
          Best Regards, Randy.

TRI-CLUB FIELD TRIP SCHEDULE.
Tentative Schedule As of 3/10/2007. *

* Please call field trip leader to confirm schedule in the event of a change to published dates/times.
** Ron will be these at events and may not have telephone service during this time.

  Table of Contents.

HINTS AND TIPS FOR ROCKHOUNDS
(See NOTE at end).

Pre-polish for Faceters: Faceters pre-polish at 3,000 and finish at 50,000. If you use 8,000 diamond to pre-polish, your material will pit and take 10 times as long to polish!
     Via Pegmatite March 2007 via John Franke of the Facet Shoppe.

Removing Lacquer: Ever want to remove a lacquer coating from an otherwise nice piece of lapidary material? Want to avoid using harsh chemicals? Here is a tip for you. Obtain some apple cider vinegar, the brown colored kind. Submerge the lacquered object in it, leave for a week, then remove and scrape off the lacquer with your thumbnail or other appropriate blunt tool. Repeat if necessary.
     Via Pegmatite March 2007 (SDMGS member Mary Jane Dunn says it really works!!)

Robyn Hawk asked: What can I do to prevent undercutting and how, if possible, avoid it altogether. I am cabbing a piece of Death Valley Picture Jasper and am having so much trouble with it.
Steve Ramsdell replied: The easy way is to use all diamond equipment. Diamond cuts everything softer at just about equal rates. The hard way for us cheap skates is to start hand sanding after the rough sanding. Start with 220 grit and work your way up. Use sand paper wet on a felt or soft rubber pad. The pad helps get rid of flats. Rinse between grits just like usual. If you use an oxide polish, use a lighter touch. Some stones can show an undercutting at this stage.
     Via LA-ROCKS.

NOTE: The club presents these hints and tips for informational purposes only and does not specifically endorse or profess first-hand use or experience with any or all. As always, be aware of your situation, knowledge level and comfort zone before attempting anything new. When in doubt, STOP! Get help BEFORE you need it.

Keep a log in your shop. Document your techniques and inspirations. You will come up with a journal full of useful tips, and maybe even an educational article or two!! Email hints and tips to vgms_editor@adelphia.net.

Let us hear about your good ideas!

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FEDERATION NEWS.

New Forest Road Plans For All National Forests in the U.S.
By Shirley Leeson & Dee Holland beauholland@salmoninternet.com and shirleyleeson@msn.com.

     Our most recent information on hearings was for the Stanislaw National Forest, public hearings were held in February and March, but contact your local forestry office and ask for information immediately. Get your name and email in their system.
     We attended the 2nd round of Forestry Public Forums on Road Closures in our Salmon/Challis National Forest up here in Idaho. The first meetings were last summer, and these meetings, if Blue Ribbon hadn't contacted us, were not published. None of the local people knew about the meetings till we contacted the local 4-wheel drive dealership and the taxidermy, hunter and fishermen's businesses. They were astonished they hadn't been informed.
     We found the following: Plans were already underway. They had huge forest quadrant maps with roads already in red for open (at the moment) and black, proposed closures, and blue, private or county roads.
     The Forestry people were friendly and helpful, but cautious. We got lots of printed material. The one for us that was the most important was a paper with the following: For each road, trail, route or area that you would recommend for addition or deletion to the designated system of open motorized use, please provide the following information:

     For each road or trail, there must be a worksheet made out. Dee is in the process of checking each road and trail.
     There will be another meeting in town next Wednesday, and we have alerted a number of people to attend. Again, this wasn't published and when I asked why they said they thought they had enough emails from the first meetings, so didn't bother and that's what we're dealing with.
     Dee Holland has been sending information from the Blue Ribbon Alert System to all those CFMS members who we have emails for. Unfortunately, that's not too many. If you are interested in being a part of this National Forest Road Closure process, send us your email and we will alert you to information going on in your area. If you received something from Dee Holland or Shirley Leeson, and you can't attend, please make sure someone will represent rockhounds. We must get the fact that we exist out there to the Forest people.
     The BLM is also doing a "Management Plan Program". There were meetings for Riverside, Imperial Counties and Yuma County in Arizona recently. This is an area of real concern to CFMS rockhounds.
     Will alert you to more when we have it.

          Via March 2007 Newsletter.

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DETERMINING THE TOWNSHIP.

To begin I will quote from the AFMS Code of Ethics, "I will keep informed on all laws, regulations and rules governing collecting on public lands and will observe them. I will, to the best of my ability, ascertain the boundary lines of property on which I plan to collect."

It is the responsibility of the fieldtrip chairperson to do the footwork mentioned before having a fieldtrip. I have normally used the BLM office in Sacramento to begin this process. One cannot go to the BLM in Hollister for this information because there is no computer for public access.

From my experience it is important to determine the Township, Section and Range of the purposed site. This is of course when it is public land. Land status can change so status should be checked up to date.

Obtain a surface management status map from the U.S. Department of the Interior Bureau of Land Management, California State Office, Sacramento, CA 95825 . Open the large map on a table with plenty of room and locate the site. Look at the west and east borders of the map. You will see a capital "T" with a number of the Township and a letter of direction, N or S. The number of the Township corresponds to the south of the line to the next Township line and west to east across the map.

The Township lines are thicker than section line borders and run horizontally west to east. Determining the Township is the first step in determining the Township, Section and Range of the purposed fieldtrip. Once these co-ordinates have been established and the exact site and its boundaries are found, then with the help of the BLM, the status of the land may be ascertained.

     Dave Muster,
     CFMS Fieldtrips North,
     CFMS Newsletter March 2007.

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FOSSIL COLLECTING BILL.

     Looks like things are heating up again in the US Congress pertaining to our collecting rights. I've just been sent the following information from Jon Spunaugle, ALAA Executive VP for Legislation. During the last session of Congress we were able to get the House bill "killed" through swift action by a rockhound member.
     Unfortunately this will not be possible again this year due to the manner in which the bill was introduced.
     Let's get the word out and contact our Representatives and Senators sooner rather than later urging a vote AGAINST this legislation.
     Remember that fossils today could well mean minerals and cutting rough tomorrow. Also do not forget to include a letter to Speaker Pelosi who can determine when this bill is brought out of committee and onto the House floor.
     Here is Jon's message. You can read the full text of HR554 at http://thomas.loc.gov/, type HR554 in the box labeled 'Search Bill Text', click on the circle next to 'Bill Number', and then click on 'SEARCH'. (By the way, if you received Jon's original e-mail, he had the bill number listed incorrectly. The correct Bill is HR554).

Fossil Collecting Bill introduced into the US House January 23, 2007.
     "On January 18, 2007 a Fossil Collecting Bill HR554 'Paleontological Resources Preservation Act' was introduced into the US House of Representatives by Congressional Representatives McGovern of Massachusetts and Renzi of Arizona. It was sent to the Committee on Natural Resources and Agriculture for a period of time to be determined by the Speaker of the House. (This means that regardless of what the Committee Chair people do, the Bill can be brought to the floor of the US House for a vote at any time with or without amendment or Committee recommendation.)
     "Preliminary examination of the actual Bill language suggests that it is very similar to the Bills introduced and passed by the U S Senate in past years. Casual collecting would be allowed as seen appropriate by the government land managers. Provisions for civil and criminal penalties remain in the Bill as does a rewards section for information on possible violators and other property confiscation including all paleontology resources."
          Carolyn Weinberger,
          AFMS Editor,
          CFMS March 2007 Newsletter.

  Table of Contents.

LET'S BE SAFE OUT THERE.

We Should Be Aware of Safety At All Times
By Chuck McKie, CFMS Safety Chairman 2007.

     There are many people new to rock hounding and some of the older ones might need a little reminding. Lots of us will be going on field trips whether singularly or in groups.

Start by making sure your tools are safe.
     Chisels: Heads of chisels should not have any mushroom heads. If the heads are rounded over with fingers (jagged pieces of metal) sticking out from the head of the chisel, grind them off even with the head of the chisel. I carry a piece of metal in my arm that flew off like a bullet - from a mushroom head when I was beating on a chisel to beat off a ball-bearing from an axle. It could do the same to you if you were trying to break a rock.
     Sledges: Use a size you can handle. I have a 1#, 2#, 4#, 6#, and 8# sledges. There are even larger ones. Be sure the heads are tight on the handles. You can obtain little pie shaped pieces of metal from hardware stores which can be driven into the wood of the handle where it goes through the head.
     Hammers: The same applies to hammers.
     Rock picks: Most rock picks have handles formed from the same metal as the head. Do not use your rock pick to beat on a chisel. A rock pick is designed to beat on a rock, not on metal.
     Safety glasses: Always use safety glasses when striking a rock or a chisel. A little flying chip can put your eye out in a heart beat. If someone else is striking with a hammer or a sledge, and you are near-by, be aware, turn your face away, wear glasses, and or move away. You, as a wielder of a hammer/sledge, must be aware of others in your vicinity and wait for them to move to take preventative action.
     Gloves: Use heavy gloves. When holding a chisel, especially when you become weary, you may miss the head of the chisel and hit your hand. THAT HURTS! We all do that. A heavy glove helps cushion the blow to your hand and helps to lessen the damage to your hand. A good idea is to take a short section of a garden hose, insert your chisel through the one end of the hose, and hold the other end of the hose.
     Shovels, rakes, hoes: Tighten the handles, maybe drive a nail or a screw through the metal where the wood enters the head. You might have to drill a small hole in the metal.
     Shoveling, raking, hoeing, tossing rocks out of your way: Be certain that no one is in the path of your refuse or below you out of sight. DO NOT dig under a large overhang. If an overhang were to collapse upon you, you could suffocate before anyone noticed your predicament.
          CFMS March 2007 Newsletter.


Proper Use of Chemicals.

Know the proper use of chemicals:

• Phosphorous ignites when it comes in contact with air.
• Sodium and Potassium ignite in contact with water.
• Turpentine and ammonia react in contact with Chlorine gas.
• Hydrogen and Chlorine ignite by exposure to light.
• ALWAYS POUR SULFURIC ACID slowly INTO water, NEVER pour water into sulfuric acid.

Keep all chemicals out of reach of children, and you yourself learn the right antidotes for each poisonous substance you use.

Remember that many acids and some alkalis are corrosive or caustic. Learn the difference between corrosive, caustic, flammable, injurious and poisonous chemicals. Learn the first-aid procedures that apply to each class of chemicals that you use and come in contact with.

Be careful what you lick or taste, especially before you know what it contains. Arsenic, mercury, selenium, some of the boron minerals, and some sulfates are very poisonous.

Be sure of sufficient ventilation in cleaning and testing materials. This applies to bead tests, tests with acid and other chemicals. It is advisable to wear a mask besides having proper ventilation when dry sanding mercury, arsenic, copper, selenium, and silica minerals. Abalone shell when worked dry can make you very ill, without enough ventilation.

Use care in handling radioactive minerals with bare hands, especially taking care not to breathe in the dust. Spray radioactive minerals with several coats of lacquer to prevent dusting and flaking. Handle with a pair of tongs when not placed in an oversized bag, keeping at least an inch between the radioactive specimen and the wall of the box.

Wear safety goggles or shatterproof glasses when breaking rocks to avoid eye injuries. Always wear a mask if you do not have a way to remove injurious dust or fumes. Watch out for sharp tools and blades without proper guards in the equipment.

The above items were taken from LOUISE PHILEBROOK'S SAFETY AND THE ROCKHOUND.

  Table of Contents.

EDUCATIONAL CORNER.

Definition of the Month.

Lakester - Also known as a "Lake Racer", an automobile custom built for racing on desert dry lakes. Dry lake racing began in the 1930's on the dry lakes of the California Desert and at the Bonneville Salt Flat in Utah. The sport consisted of drag racing on the naturally level surfaces of the hard mud or salt flats common in enclosed basins in arid regions. Drag racing in the United States was born on dry lakes long before drag strips were developed. During World War II, gasoline, lube oil and other supplies became scarce, causing the sport to cease temporarily. Also, most of the race drivers became involved in the war effort. By 1946, when fuel and lube oil became readily available, the sport reemerged. Two of the most popular sites for racing competitions in California were Muroc Dry Lake (now known as Rogers Dry Lake, currently Edwards Air Force Base, Kern County) and El Mirage Dry Lake (northwest of Victorville, San Bernardino County). Muroc provided 12 1/2 miles of continuously flat straightaway while El Mirage was approximately 5 miles in length.

Most of the early lake racers were modified Model "A" vintage auto bodies with souped-up engines. Auto bodies were altered in order to reduce vehicle weight and wind drag. Quite often, fenders, bumpers, spare tires, roof, back seats, engine hood, trunk cover and other non-essential parts were removed to create a "bare-bones" jalopy. After World War II, auto bodies were aerodynamically redesigned to reduce the affects of wind drag. One famous Lakester body design involved the use of a tear-drop shaped auxiliary "drop tank" (an external, expendable airplane fuel tank made of aluminum) that was used during the war on Lockheed P-38 aircraft. This technique incorporated aerodynamics with a light-weight design in order to maximize speed on the lake bed. Many innovations in drag racing began on the dry lakes of the Mojave Desert.

Written by Steve Mulqueen for the Ventura Gem & Mineral Society, March, 2007. The "Definition of the Month" features words related to geology, paleontology, mining and desert history.

Illustration of the Month.

Union Oil Company advertisement showing a Lakester
with the aerodynamic "drop-tank" body design.

Source: Desert Magazine, November 1950, back cover, Union Oil Company of California advertisement.

The "Illustration of the Month" features a drawing, sketch, pen & ink rendering, engraving print or any form of art rediscovered in books, maps, manuscripts and many other sources related to geology, paleontology, mining and desert history. This illustration was chosen for its educational content by Steve Mulqueen, Ventura Gem & Mineral Society, March, 2007.

  Table of Contents.

2007 CFMS SHOWS.

MARCH 16, 17, 18; SAN BERNARDINO - Orange Belt Gem & Mineral Society, Western Region Little League Ballpark, 6707 Little League Drive. Hours: Fri. & Sat. 9-Dusk; Sun. 9-4. Al Carrell (951) 961-5988, Emma Rose (951) 288-6182, Lyle (707) 887-3394.
MARCH 23, 24, 25; BAKERSFIELD, CA - San Joaquin Valley Lapidary Society, Indoor Show/Outdoor Tail Gate, 5th Annual Rock & Mineral Rendezvous, Kern County Fairgrounds. Hours: Fri. 9-8; Sat. & Sun. 9-5. Lewis Helfrich (661) 872-8230 or (661) 323-2663.
MARCH 24-25; ANGELS CAMP, CA - Calaveras Gem & Mineral Society, Calaveras Co. Fairgrounds, Hwy 49. Hours: Sat. 10-5; Sun. 10-4. Tom Reeves (209) 754-4863, Email: star@volcano.net.
MARCH 24-25; ROSEVILLE, CA - Roseville Rock Rollers, 800 All America City Blvd. Hours: Sat. 10-5; Sun. 10-4. Jim Hutchings (530) 367-5108, Email: rockroller@hotmail.com, Website: www.rockrollers.com.
MARCH 31-APRIL 1; TORRANCE, CA - South Bay Lapidary & Mineral Society, Ken Miller Recreation Center, 3941 Torrance Blvd. Hours: Sat. 10-5; Sun. 10-4. Omer Goeden (310) 318-2170 Email: lesneff@aol.com.
APRIL 14-15: MARIPOSA, CA - Mariposa Gem & Mineral Club, Mariposa County Fairgrounds. Hours: 10-5 both days, Peggy Ronning (209) 742-7625, Email: mineralmuseum@sti.net, Website: www.palosverdes.com/sblap.
APRIL 14-15; SAN JOSE, CA - Santa Clara County Fairgrounds, 334 Tully Road. Hours: 10-5 both days. Marc Mullaney (408) 691-1584, Email: geologistm@aol.com, Website: www.scvgms.org.
APRIL 28-29; SANTA CRUZ, CA - Santa Cruz Mineral & Gem Society, Civic Auditorium @ Center & Church Sts. Hours: 10-5 both days. Eleanor & Hubert Drake (831) 688-8086, Email: hmdrake@pacbell.net.
MAY 4, 5, 6; BISHOP, CA - Lone Pine Gem & Mineral Society, Tri County Fairgrounds, Sierra Street & Fair Drive. Hours: Fri. 5-9, Sat. 9-5, Sun. 10-3. Francis Pedneau (760) 876-4319, Jeff Lines (760) 937-4498.
MAY 12-13: RENO, NEVADA - Reno Gem & Mineral Society, Reno Livestock Events Center, 1350 N. Wells Ave. Sat. 10-5; Sun. 10-4. John Peterson (775) 356-8820, Website: renorockclub.com.
MAY 18-20; REDDING , CA - Superior California Gem & Mineral Association, Shasta County Fairgrounds, Anderson, CA. Hours: Fri. & Sat. 9-5; Sun. 10-4. Bill Seward (530) 365-8641.
MAY 19-20; YUCAIPA, CA - Yucaipa Valley Gem & Mineral Society, Yucaipa Community Center, 34900 Oak Glen Road. Hours: Sat. 9-5; Sun. 10-4. Bill Jochimsen Email: bjm2285@aol.com, Website: mysite.verizon.net/yucaipagem/.
May 19-20; NEWBURY PARK, CA - Conejo Valley Gem & Mineral Club, Borchard Park, 190 Reino Rd., Newbury Park, CA. Hours: Sat 9-5; Sun 10-4:30. Robert Sankovich 805-494-7734, E-mail: rmsorca@adelphia.net.
MAY 26, 27, 28; WEAVERVILLE, CA - Trinity Gem & Mineral Society, Lowden Park, 550 Washington St. Hours: Sat & Sun 10-5; Mon 10-4. Jack Renewing 778-3786, Jim Robertson 623-3493.
JUNE 2-3; GLENDORA, CA - Glendora Gems, 859 E. Sierra Madre. Hours: Sat. 10-5; Sun. 10-4. Bonnie Bidwell (626) 963-4638, Email: Ybidwell2@aol.com.
JUNE 2-3; LA HABRA, CA - North Orange County Gem & Mineral Society, La Habra Community Center, 101 W. La Habra Blvd. Hours: 9-5 both days. Don Warthen (626) 330-8974, Email: warthen@earthlink.net.
JUNE 15, 16, 17; LANCASTER, CA - Palmdale Gem & Mineral Club, 50 years of Rock N Gems, Antelope Valley Fairgrounds, Hwy. 14, exit Ave. H. Hours: 9-5 daily, John & Susie Martin (661) 916-9479, E-mail: pgmc@antelecom.net.
AUGUST 3-5; NIPOMO, CA - Orcutt Mineral Society, St. Joseph Church, 298 S. Thompson Ave. Wes Lingerfelt, (805) 929-3788.
AUGUST 31-SEPT 3; FORT BRAGG, CA - Mendocino Coast Gem & Mineral Society, Town Hall, Main & Laural. Hours: Fri., Sat., & Sun. 10-6; Mon. 10-4. Don McDonell (707) 964-3116, 643 N. Mc Pherson, Fort Bragg, CA 95437.
OCTOBER 7; FALLBROOK, CA - Fallbrook Gem & Mineral Society, Fall Festival of Gems, FGMS Museum @ 123 W. Alvarado. Hours: 10-4. Mary Fong-Walker (760) 723-3484, Email: mrwizard@tfb.com, Website: www.fgms.org/.
OCTOBER 13-14; GRASS VALLEY, CA - Nevada County Gem & Mineral Society, Earth's Treasures, Nevada County Fairgrounds, 11228 McCourtney Road. Hours: 10-5 both days. Cliff Swenson (530) 272-3752.
OCTOBER 20-21; ANDERSON, CA - Shasta Gem & Mineral Society, Shasta District Fairgrounds. Hours: Sat. 9-5; Sun. 10-4. Bill Seward (530) 365-8641.
OCTOBER 20-21; PLACERVILLE, CA - El Dorado County Mineral & Gem Society, El Dorado County Fairgrounds, 100 Placerville Drive. Hours: 10-5 both days. Jackie Cerrato (530) 677-2975, Email: jacbobcer@directcon.net, Website: eldoradomineralandgem.org.
NOVEMBER 3-4; CONCORD, CA - Contra Costa Mineral & Gem Society, Centre Concord, 5298 Clayton Rd. Hours: 10-5 both days. Sam Woolsey (925) 837-3287.
NOVEMBER 10-11; YUBA CITY, CA - Sutter Buttes Gem & Mineral Society, Festival of Gems, Grace Franklin Hall, 442 Franklin Avenue. Hours: Sat. 9-5; Sun. 9-4. Cliff Swenson (530) 272-3752.

AMERICAN FEDERATION / REGIONAL
SHOW SCHEDULE - 2007.

ROCKY MOUNTAIN FEDERATION,
June 7-10, Roswell, NM.

CALIFORNIA FEDERATION,
June 15-17, Lancaster, CA.

NORTHWESTERN FEDERATION,
August 3-5, Butte, MT.

MIDWESTERN FEDERATION,
August 11-12, Houghton, MI.

EASTERN FEDERATION,
October 6-7, Newark, NY.

  Table of Contents.

CALIFORNIA'S DESERTS.

     Look at a relief map of California; one that shows the location of our principal mountain ranges. Everything east of the great mountain ranges that run from the Oregon border to Baja California (approximately one-third of the state) is classified as desert. These deserts have one thing in common: drought. If an area gets less than ten inches of precipitation per year, it usually is considered to be a desert. Mountain ranges form a barrier that intercepts the precipitation from Pacific storms so that the deserts lie in a "Rainbow Shadow". What differs in California's three deserts is the average temperature, the time of year most of the precipitation falls, and the major form of the precipitation.
     Our most northern desert is the Great Basin. It lies between the Cascades and the Sierra Nevada on the west and the Rocky Mountains on the east. Only the western edge is in California. It includes the Modoc Plateau, the Mono Basin, and Owens Valley. Because the Great Basin is so large, it has been said that Great Basin Sagebrush is the most common plant in the Western United States.
     South of the Great Basin is the Mojave Desert. It is classified as a warm desert because most of its precipitation falls as rain, but at higher elevations along the edges of valleys it still gets a significant amount of snow. The Mojave includes an area east of the southern Sierra Nevada and the Transverse Ranges, including the San Gabriel and San Bernardino Mountains. It also includes southern Nevada, north-western Arizona, and south-western Utah. It is called the "high desert" because parts of it lie above 3500' elevation. However, the northern boundary of the desert has several finger-like extensions, Panamint Valley, Saline Valley, and Eureka Valley, which are of low elevation. You will find the Creosote Bush and Joshua Trees disappear from this scenery.
     The Colorado Desert is our southernmost desert. It is the warmest of our local deserts by virtue of two factors, its southern position and its low elevation. Much of it lies at sea level or below. About half of its precipitation arrives during the summer, usually as thunderstorms.
     The Colorado Desert is part of a larger southern desert known as the Sonoran Desert. California's part of the Sonoran Desert lies west of the Colorado River and extends northward to the vicinity of Needles, California. It includes the lowlands of the Salton Trough, a region of subsidence along the San Andreas Fault, and south of the Little San Bernardino and Eagle Mountains, it extends eastward toward the Colorado River.
     Finally, it is the Colorado Desert that seems to produce the most spectacular display of annual wildflowers, particularly conspicuous in the dunes near Palm Springs, Borrego Springs, and east of Twenty-nine Palms. These are annuals or ephemerals. They need at least an inch of rain early in the winter (by October) and then a lot of sunshine.
          Via March 2007 Lapidarian [Christian Kilkka via California Horticultural Society].

  Table of Contents.

SUPPORT AND PRACTICE
THE AFMS CODE OF ETHICS.

THINK YOU ARE SMART?

Here's a link to prove it: http://www.flashbynight.com/test/.

  Table of Contents.

SOUND BARRIER:
DID YOU KNOW IT IS A VISUAL THING?

A sonic boom is the bang you hear when a jet plane breaks the sound barrier. OK folks, for all of you who have never personally seen the sound barrier, feast your eyes on the picture below.

Photo credits: Greog Stansbery, Andreas Zeitler (Flying Wings) via Arlines.Net.

Jerry: I vaguely recall from a course I took many years ago (Gas Dynamics or Aerodynamics) that this is called a "Condensation Shock" wave. Any explanation from my old Lockheed Martin (Martin Marietta) buddies?

Dick Keenan responded for your information: The clouds appear for the same reason that clouds always form, namely, that the air has cooled to the point that the ambient water vapor condenses. Flows around bodies and wings always change the temperature and pressure of the fluid. Lift is caused by pressure differences on top or bottom of a wing or body. The pressure varies from point to point in a flow around an object. Temperature changes can be seen by noting that most fluid flows (and nearly every aerodynamic flow) are frictionless. In the language of thermodynamics, the flow is said to be reversible or loss-free. As a result, the entropy of the flow is a constant, and the temperature (T) at each point in the flow is necessarily related to the pressure (p) as follows: T a p(g - 1)/g for low pressure gases. The constant g is the ratio of specific heats. For air, g = 1.4 and the exponent on the pressure (p) in the above equation is approximately 0.29. Thus, the temperature of the air will increase and decrease as the pressure increases and decreases. Regions of high pressure will necessarily correspond to regions of high temperature and regions of low pressure will correspond to regions of low temperature.

I thought everybody knew that!

Editors Note: This page is sourced from an email I received from Jerry Anderson. I worked for Jerry at ARCO Solar where he developed encapsulation for solar modules. He is currently retired and living a good life in North Carolina (his garage is 3X the size of my house!). He emails a lot of neat stuff, some of which I cannot help but share with you. I am introducing him because no doubt you will see his byline frequently. I also worked for Dick Keenan at ARCO Solar. Jerry worked on the Apollo program. Dick and Jerry shared a few space adventures together at Martin Marietta. Quite a duo. Very smart and very funny!

  Table of Contents.

MUD GEYSER DISASTER.

     Indonesian engineers temporarily halted an attempt to plug a fissure that has been gushing mud for nine months, after a steel cable hoisting concrete balls into the crater broke Saturday [February 3, 2006], officials said.
     The hot, noxious mud has displaced 13,000 people and covered dozens of factories and thousands of homes. The mud has blocked major roads into the country's second largest city, Surabaya.
     Over the next few weeks, authorities plan to drop nearly 1,500 concrete balls, weighing up to 500 pounds each, into the geyser. A string of four balls was successfully lowered into the hole Saturday in heavy rain and wind, said Rudi Novrianto, a spokesman for a government task force handling the disaster.
     "Thank God, we have managed to drop one chain, equipped with sensors to monitor pressure and depth," he said.
     Officials had hoped to drop from five to 10 strands of balls into the mud volcano Saturday.
     If successful, the project will decrease by up to 70 percent the volume of mud now being channeled by a system of dams into a nearby river and out to sea. The mud has been surging at a rate that could fill 50 Olympic-sized swimming pools a day. Critics, however, doubt the project will succeed and warn it could be dangerous or that deep underground pressure could push the mud up elsewhere.
     Mud fissures occur naturally along volatile tectonic belts like the one running below Indonesia, the world's largest archipelago.
     However, opinions differ about the cause of the latest rupture. Independent geological studies suggest it was triggered by faulty gas exploration techniques by operator PT Lapindo Brantas, which created fissures in a bed of porous limestone. Other research supports the company's assertion that it was a natural disaster resulting from increased seismic activity following a major earthquake two days before the mud began flowing.

Source: "Engineers Halt Effort to Plug Mud Geyser", Star Free Press February 2, 2006 via SURABAYA, Indonesia (AP).

  Table of Contents.

ANCIENT IMPACT TURNED PART OF EARTH INSIDE-OUT.

     A space rock the size of a large mountain hit 1.8 billion years ago and dredged up part of Earth's lower crust, essentially turning a bit of the planet inside out, a new study concludes.
     Earth's upper crust is about 22 miles (35 kilometers) thick. Scientists have debated how deeply into the crust the shock wave from a large asteroid could penetrate. All the way to the next layer, it appears.
     The evidence comes from a crater in Sudbury, Ontario. Most of the crater was long ago folded into the planet or eroded away. But a section is exposed, revealing minerals and other features that can be compared to more recent craters that are more intact. From all this, scientists gleaned clues to the catastrophic impact.
     It appears an asteroid about 6 miles (10 kilometers) wide hit the planet at more than 89,000 mph (40 kilometers per second).
     "The impact punched a hole to the very base of the crust and the meteorite itself was probably vaporized," said University of Toronto geologist James Mungall, who led the study. Much of the heating and damage is done by a shock wave that compresses material ahead of the impacting object.
     A plume of superheated rock from deep down surged upward and landed on top of the impact site, creating the melt layer visible today.
     In a telephone interview, Mungall explained that in the top layers of the Sudbury structure, his team found relatively high concentrations of iron, nickel and platinum, stuff that is more common in the lower crust of the planet than in the upper crust (the elements exist in just trace amounts in both regions). The lower crust sits atop Earth's mantle, which surrounds the core.
     "Since it ended up on top, it effectively inverted the layering of the crust," he said. "It had not really been appreciated that large impacts would selectively move material from the bottom of the crust up to the top."
     The top layers were also relatively depleted of zirconium, uranium and other elements that tend to show up in other impact sites that only involved melting of the upper crust.
     The results were detailed in the June 3 issue of the journal Nature.
     Mungall's team also found an enrichment of iridium in the overlying layer at the Sudbury complex, which was already thought to be part of an impact crater. Iridium is commonly associated with extraterrestrial rocks and is a strong indicator of an impact. The crater was initially more than 125 miles (200 kilometers) wide.
     The study was funded in part by the Ontario Geological Survey and the Geological Survey of Canada.

Source: By Robert Roy Britt Senior Science Writer posted: 12:25 pm ET 04 June 2004, http://www.space.com/scienceastronomy/inside_out_040604.html.

  Table of Contents.

NEULOGISM CONTEST 2006.

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.

The winners are:

1. Coffee (n.): the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.): appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v.): to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v.): to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.): impotent.
6. Negligent (adj.): describes a condition in which you absent-mindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v.): to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n.): olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n.): emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n.): a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n.): a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n.): the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n): a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (n.): a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.): (back by popular demand) the belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n.): an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

ALSO ...
The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:

1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
2. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
3. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
4. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
5. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
6. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
7. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
8. Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
9. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
10. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
11. Dopeler Effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
12. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
13. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

Kathryn Wotkyns via email.

  Table of Contents.

STORY OF THE THUNDEREGGS.

     Thundereggs are agate-filled nodules found in various parts of the Western United States. They range in size from 1/4 inch to as large as 5 feet in diameter. Generally, they are about the size of oranges. All are similar on the exterior, but no two are alike in pattern, design or color on the inside. The most colorful and beautiful of Thundereggs come from a small area in Jefferson County in Central Oregon (Pony Butte). In other localities they do not show such brilliant color and gem quality. In spite of their superior quality, only one in an average of twenty cut make outstanding specimens. These show vivid scenes of land and sea fantasies, which besides the bright hues, reveal the appearance of depth and dimension of distance. Cut and polished Thundereggs are beautiful to behold. They are one of the marvels of nature and are sought after and highly prized the world over.
     According to legend, Thundereggs were so named by Native Americans of Central Oregon. The natives of this region are said to have believed these strange, agate-filled stones were missiles thrown by angry, fighting "Thunder Spirits" or "Gods" who dwelt on Mount Jefferson and nearby Mount Hood, two of the several snow-capped peaks high in the Cascade Range. The Native Americans thought when thunderstorms occurred these rival, jealous gods hurled large numbers of the round-shaped rocks at each other in furious anger. Thus, according to Native American legend, Thundereggs were scattered over the high plateaus of Central Oregon.
     The unique agate-filled mud balls are found in layers of rhyolite lava flows, which spread over the land an estimated 60 million years ago. This was long before man appeared on the earth and thousands of centuries before the Cascade Mountain range was formed and pushed upward, due to tremendous stress beneath the surface of the planet. Geologists reason that the round-shaped Thundereggs were formed in gas pockets, serving as molds, that were left in the lava plows of the Eocene Geological Age. Over long periods of time, the gas cavities or cooled bubbles were gradually filled by water percolating through the porous rock formations, Water (hot or cold) oozing into the cavities carried rich quantities of silica (quartz). The solution lined, and in many cases filled, the cavity molds, first with the darker matrix material, then the inner core of agate or chalcedony. The beautiful and varying colors were derived from nearby minerals present in the soil. These processes are still going on, but at a much slower rate than during the times of volcanic action, with huge clouds and deposits of volcanic ash rich in silica (quartz).
     Many geologists agree that the materials used by nature in forming these exquisite agate-filled Thundereggs came from the surrounding rhyolite lava frock in which they were formed. The matrix and the agate centers were made and composed by water carrying silica and minerals in solution. The water, by continuous action, robbed the rhyolite flows of its rich silica composition, causing it to eventually decompose. The harder more durable agate materials stayed in place.
     This is very likely the origin of Thundereggs. Many await discovery in the now loose beds of decomposed rhyolite - to be dug, sawed and polished by the expert craftsperson, thereby revealing the hidden beauty of this remarkable "Wonder of Nature", the lasting enjoyment and adoration to all who are fortunate enough to view their splendor.

Richardson's Rock Ranch Gateway Rt. Box 440 Madras, Oregon 97741 (541) 475-2680, E-mail: richardsonranch@bendnet.com.

  Table of Contents.

SUPPORT AND PRACTICE
THE AFMS CODE OF ETHICS.

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